This blog post is dedicated to M., a beautiful young lady who I was lucky enough to meet a few years back. She has just recently left home to start her studies and cannot wait to explore more of the world. She asked me to write about how I overcame the fear of travelling by myself. Oh well, the truth is I never have :D I just have the skill to close my eyes whenever I book that ticket and let anxiety creep in only a few days before departure, asking myself: "Why oh why did I do this again?". It does not last very long though. Once I get off the plane, excitement sets in again. I guess there is just no time to get scared. I need to find out how to get to my first destination, where to draw money, where to buy food, and how to navigate in my new environment. And then... I am right in the middle of it. And also I am never alone for very long... But obviously, the answer is not that simple. There is more to it, most of which I have (subconsciously) learned over time and with experience. So I have given it some thought. And here is what I came up with (M., I hope it helps :))
1. Ease into it.
Your first trip does not have to be a solo survival trek through the rainforest of Panama (Unless you want to go at full speed right away :D) I did not travel by myself in the beginning at all. In the States, I had a best travel buddy and we planned all our weekend trips together. The majority of them were city outings to NYC, Chicago, Boston, Miami. Towards the end, I joined a four week guided camping tour along the US West Coast. Though I did not know a single soul, I could at least leave all the sorting out of everything else to our guide (except putting up the tent and helping with cooking and washing the dishes). During my first semester break back in Germany, I backpacked through Italy and Greece together with a friend. We had booked a train ticket that allowed us to hop on and off as much as we liked for a period of three weeks. Unfortunately the trip came to a premature and horrible end when I was robbed on a bus in Naples. But even though it was a bit of a traumatic experience, it did not put me off travelling at all. It was in Greece where I met a bunch of young women who told me about their solo travels through Asia. I admired them for their courage. And even though I did not see myself being brave enough to do the same the "subconscious preparation process" had started - I am so convinced of it :D I just needed to get ready and into the right state of mind. And that was in 2003 after my internship in Malaysia. I went on a two months exploration of Thailand, Lao and Cambodia!
2. Inform yourself.
I think my German friends and colleagues always considered me a bit of a nutcase when it came to the choice of my travel destinations - be it Guatemala, Colombia, or Rwanda and Uganda where I ventured just before moving to South Africa. The truth is that we all have a predefined picture of a region or country. We consider some safe, some poor, some dangerous. But the picture does not always correlate with reality. And I think this is one of the reasons I love travelling so much. It is ALWAYS a surprise. And I never choose a country without at least some preparation. I read a lot - in magazines, on official government travel advisory websites and in travel blogs. I watch YouTube documentaries. And I talk to people who have lived or visited the country on my bucket list. Though not everyone is into that kind of travel preparation, it gives me a sense of ease. I know what to expect, at least to a certain extent. It also allows me to understand more about the culture, customs and do's and don't's of the destination (e.g. how to greet or what to wear). And for me it is an integral and fun part of the experience as a whole.
3. Plan ahead and pack the essentials.
Make sure that you take what you need, especially if you travel to more remote destinations. There is nothing worse than getting somewhere only to realize that there is no way of drawing money. Or to find out that the shops are closed and you are heading off to the jungle the very next day. Here is where planning comes in handy, in particular when it comes to anything related to money, health (medication) and safety. Always expect the unexpected (E.g. when I travelled through Cambodia in 2004, there was not a single ATM in the whole country so it was an absolute requirement to take cash - in the right currency :D). Also consider language barriers. When I explored China, I loved the little picture book that was given to me by my Chinese colleagues. It contained all kinds of destinations, in English and Chinese language and as a drawing. I was still getting nervous when embarking on a ten hour bus trip. But somehow and luckily I always ended up in the right place :D A similar vocabulary list helped a friend and me in Egypt as well. Else we would have never made it to the train station on time. The problem comes when you cannot pronounce, and they cannot read... just imagine it :D
4. Mix it up and join others.
You can always mix group and solo travel as you go. Maybe you can start off visiting a relative or friend to acclimatize, then continue with your journey. Or you might meet like-minded people right at the beginning and decide to join them for a few days. This is pretty much what happened during my trip through Asia. Since I had quite some time, I did not plan ahead and mostly went with the flow. I flew to Bangkok and spent two or three days with two of my best friends from university (My friend's dad had a business in Thailand and they were spending their holidays there at the same time). When I eventually ventured off by myself it felt a bit awkward at first. But I soon met other travellers at the backpacker I stayed at and in no time at all found myself on a bus to northern Thailand together with them. We had a few great days and then separated to continue our individual journeys. And this is what happened all along again and again. Alone time to just chill, think and enjoy the beauty of your surroundings, then unexpected encounters with amazing people that sometimes led to life-long friendships.
5. Go with the flow, enjoy and grow.
Once in the country be aware and observe, do as the locals do and go with the flow. Most of all enjoy! Many people do not understand why someone would choose to travel alone. I absolutely love it (And thinking about the fact that I have not done it in a while makes my feet itch :D). Travelling alone allows you to follow your own route and do all the stuff that has forever been on your bucket list (because it is not always easy to find someone to join). Dancing the night away in vibrant cities, hiking to the deepest depths of jungles, sipping on cocktails on beautiful beaches, visiting historical sights in Europe, tasting the most delicious food in Asia - you name it. Travelling alone forces you out of your comfort zone every single day. It makes you more independent and courageous. You meet people whose path you would normally never have crossed. And those people will teach you so much, maybe even change your life. You will create memories for a life time. You will grow and get to know yourself a little bit more along the road. The world will feel so much bigger, and the possibilities endless. And then you might also find your soul home like me... and get stuck and never return :-)
